Popular Trends I’m Not Falling For
Look, I’m all for growth. I love a good rebrand, a fresh start, a new routine that actually makes life better. But lately? The trend cycle has been trending toward utter nonsense. And I, a grown woman juggling two teenage boys, a full-time executive role, a wedding countdown, and a skincare routine I actually paid for — have thoughts.
So here they are. A lovingly curated list of popular trends I am absolutely not falling for:
1. Intermittent Fasting
I’m already fasting — unintentionally — between meetings, teen meltdowns, and forgetting to pack my own lunch. Not a lifestyle, just a Tuesday.
2. Cold Plunges
I can barely get through a lukewarm shower without screaming when the water hits my back. I’ll stick to coffee for my shock therapy, thanks.
3. Matching Family Pajamas
Cute when they were 5. At 20 and 17? It’s giving hostage situation.
4. Cottage Cheese Ice Cream
I’m sorry, but no. We’ve gone too far. Stop trying to turn side dishes into desserts. It’s ice cream or it’s a crime.
5. Coachella-Core Over 40
I’m not putting on fringe, face gems, or mesh to feel relevant. I have a mortgage and sciatica.
6. Juice Cleanses
If it doesn’t involve chewing, I’m out. My body needs food, not fluorescent liquids that taste like lawn clippings.
7. 5 A.M. Hustle Culture
I get up early to beat traffic, not to build an empire before sunrise. Let’s normalize 8 a.m. excellence.
8. Wedding TikTok Drama
I’m planning a wedding, not a reality show. No strangers are voting on my color palette.
9. “Clean Girl” Aesthetic
What even is this? A bun, gloss, and pretending you don’t have bills? I’m clean-ish. I’m moisturized. I’m busy.
10. $500 Skincare Routines
My face is not a science experiment. I believe in good ingredients, not bank account trauma.
11. Monthly Reset Videos
I love a good intention. I just don’t need a ring light and Canva template to tell me to pay my bills and drink water.
12. Inbox Zero Obsession
I run a team. My inbox is a war zone. If I answered you within 3 business days, be grateful.
13. AI-Generated Love Letters
If my fiancé ever sends me a ChatGPT-written vow, we’re going straight to couples counseling.
14. Beige Everything
Life is colorful. I refuse to live in a sand-toned Pinterest board. Let me live — and decorate — in technicolor.
15. Mommy Influencers with Spotless Homes
Good for them. But if you can see my kitchen counter, I’ve already won.
16. Quiet Luxury (but make it obvious)
The goal is peace, not performative wealth disguised as minimalism. I’m not buying a $1200 sweater to pretend I don’t care.
17. 10-Step Productivity Hacks
Sometimes success looks like answering 4 emails and remembering to defrost the chicken. Miss me with your Notion board.
18. 100-Day Workout Challenges
What if I just want to move my body and not track it like an Olympic sport?
19. DIY Botox Parties
The only thing I inject at home is almond milk into my coffee. Leave the needles to professionals.
20. Girl Dinner
I’m a woman. I need a meal. Cheese cubes and olives are an appetizer, not a personality.
Final Thought:
I’ve reached a place in life where I don’t have time for the performative, the unsustainable, or the downright absurd. Trends come and go — but common sense, confidence, and carbs? Those are forever.
