A good friend of mine recommended that I watch “I Don’t Know How She Does It” with Sarah Jessica Parker. I remember when it first came out in the theater…it was a movie about a working mother and SJP, one of my favorite actresses, was the lead actress. I remember not having time to catch it in the theater – being a working mom myself LOL. Since I travel monthly for work, what better time than to download and watch the movie during one of flights! I am so glad I did!
SJP plays a mom of two adorable kids – Ben is 2 and Emily is 6. Her husband just started his own business and work was a bit slow for him. SJP worked for a financial company – working late, out of town, but always tried her hardest to make time for her kids. Throughout the movie, friends, acquaintances, and others are “interviewed” – this adds humor and really allows the plot to flow smoothly.
There was one part in the beginning where I totally could connect with SJB. She’s laying in bed, it’s 4:45 am, and she is making a mental list of all of the things she has to do. (This reminds me a lot of my sister who, to this day, I coin as the “Queen of Lists”.) I find that happening to me more and more – waking up in the middle of the night thinking of what I have to get at Target, project due dates at work, do I have time for a manicure during lunch break, what will the kids need to bring with them to camp tomorrow?
It is hard being a working mother. I wish I was able to be around for the boys when they were infants. I did have the next best thing – my mom took care of both boys during the week until they were two – I was super lucky. I wish I could stay home and be the mom that can volunteer at school and go on the field trips. I do try to make their class parties and help out where I can in terms of sending in things that are requested for the classroom. I know the requested donation of a ream of paper doesn’t match me being the class mom, but I try to do what I can.
My husband works from home so he is the elected parent for most doctor appointments, hair cuts, and the one that picks them up when I get the call from the school nurse. I hate that. Well, let me rephrase that – I am so lucky and grateful that my husband has flexibility within his schedule, but I sometimes I want to be the one to pick them up at school, bring them home and cuddle with them when they don’t feel well.
On the other side, I like working. I like the adult interaction, the fact that I can use my creativity and brain to complete projects. During breaks, I call to make the doctor appointments, get my nails done, run errands, etc. so that when I come home from my job – I am 100% with my kids. I shop online so that I don’t have to go to the brick and mortar stores. The reason for that is two-fold actually – 1. not having to waste time going into the stores and 2. if you have kids, namely 2 boys, you know that it is like torture to even try to shop if they are with you. So, to save grief and try to limit the number of grey hairs I get before my next colorist appointment, I opt for the online route.
Are you a lot like SJP’s character? If so, comment on how you “do all that you do”!!
Susi says
Kudos to you for being able to do it and figuring out what works for you. I’ve been a stay at home mom for almost 12 years now and know this is the right thing for my family and I. I’ve tried going back to work part time but it didn’t feel right.
Dana says
It is so great that you stay home with the kids! One of my good friends stayed home with her two little ones, tried to get back into the workforce, but she couldn’t do it…she knew she needed to be with her kids.
Mamma says
right on . You get it . You cannot be all things . You and rich are doing a great job
Love you all